Walking thru Rezberry’s casino (the Risky Raccoon Resort)

by Ricey Wild
News From Indian Country

So I’m walking through Rezberry’s casino (the Risky Raccoon Resort and Kasino and Skeet Shooting Range plus a golf course) the other day. I was so happy that I got like 10 bucks to spend and may still be able to have electricity on in my house so I figure I could gamble a bit. A really, really little bit.

Just recently the Risky Raccoon upgraded from a shed to a big barn, and it’s looking fantastically good so far. The campsites around the casino will also be improved, all to include outdoor toilets with real hand sanitizer!

Just be sure to bring your own Angel Soft, or whatever wipes your butt, to be sure. This should bring in business from at least 3 miles around, and whoever might break down here on their way to another casino.

Like I said, I gots 10 bucks in my pocket, just waiting to multiply itself into a case, some steaks, a new collar for Anubis (my dog) and maybe some gas. If I was really lucky and I was totally feeling it, I could also buy some more Fancy Feast cat food for my four cats. They like that. Me too, quite tasty. Just kidding! Any rate, there I was, walking about with cash money.

At a corner I saw this pink woman playing a penny slot game named “Machine for Latinos.” I gasped, stopped, and watched as she hit the button time and time again. When she won a few centavos or so, this greasy looking Antonio Banderas looking guy would give a cheesy smile, snap his fingers and say “O-Dah-Lay!,” or whatever that means in Mexican. (Just kidding my Meso-American amigos! I know it’s Spanish for “Hey Mami! Lookit me!”)

I have to admit I was shocked to see a totally, at least what I thought to be a stereotypical caricature of my southern native cousins on a slot machine, and that apparently someone thought it was all right to do so.

There was this well-endowed woman who blows kisses when you get a couple of her, and this mariachi who when, if you get enough, gets a pink bra thrown on his large size nose. Hmmmmm.

So I’m intrigued. What do the bonus games give you? The best one is you have to get a cockroach in the first reel and then one in the fifth. The cucaracha then dances through the screen and is wild, winning you dinero or not. Fascinating. I knew then this was my new favorite game. All thoughts of racism or ethnicism or anything of the sort left my conciousness, especially after I cashed out $150 bucks and then $250. I liked them Mexicans even better then.

However, it brought to my mind this: have I been trivializing or worse, by not giving respect to the peoples’ who are represented in a surprising number of slot games? I thought about it. “Member the game, 47 Lions?”

Where yes, if you get zebras or giraffes you get points, but also for singing African people if you are lucky? And how about ancient Greeks, how would they feel about their culture being exploited in the name of greed?

Don’t answer that.

My point is after I pondered all this, and knowing my ownself to be an offender, how could I sleep at night or during the day being a perpretator of what I consider to be reprehensible? Actually, I sleep fine, and hope that someday I will be the benefactor of such exploitation again, if only to keep my lights on, food in the house and my rent paid. I ain’t proud.

So, it was then I saw this new penny slot game, “Jigging Spirits” which you may guess to that features us Indians. Yup.

Of course I had to play it. Sheez. Unreal. It so happens that I got the bonus games the first time I tried it, won a few pence, and got a lot of insight doing it. The reels had carved wooden pipes, butterflies, pottery, masks (wild), dreamcatchers, kachinas and other assorted so-called “Native” symbols, and you have to have at least three in a row to win a couple points. Of course I laughed, I had to! Otherwise it’s just too sad.

My point? Did I say I had one? Okay fine. It’s one thing when I’m playing a game and trying to get pyramids so I can get into the extra games. Them old Egyptians don’t care. Nor do the Greeks, Romans and so on. All ancient mythology right? Right.

We, however, are a living people, an ancient culture that has survived despite all attempts to obliterate any memory of our existence.

It’s like my Unk Gene always used to say, “It ain’t easy being Indian, being called wagon-burners and so on!” I say that would be a way righteous slot game, and the jackpot would be? Yeah, you guessed it. Go home ya’ll, or pay the back rent. Now.